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And tonight, she's taking chances, making memories out of what she has. Throwing caution to the wind, it feels so good to leave it all behind. Here's to being young and beautiful.

L'amour?

2 middays ago on the bus, i drafted on my cellphone about love. Ridiculous subject to ponder about but with Quelgu'un m'a dit playing in my ears? Quite possible..

This is what i wrote: You are either the type of person who sees clouds as a procreator of rain or as rolls of rolls of mint-flavoured candy floss. Just like you would see hurt as a bag of pain wrapped under 3 words of comfort; this is life. Or you divide them into i cry, i hurt, i heal. Hurt and love is synonymous. You can never see love without needles, hurt without the leeching love. And so i realised i didn't know how to define love. One day, my colleague asked: "describe love for me." So i search through my internal quotes column and only came up with.. "Love is.. Love.. must.. have passion.." Shit. Where did my life's notes over the years went? I was desperate. So i picked the one closest to my lips, the famous love quote from A walk to remember. Pathetic.. i know.. I need to rewrite.

I thought of my first love. Weren't it? I could only doubt-less that the first cut is the deepest. But love? How would you know if its true? And true love? its ever-lasting isn't it? And you then might even rejoice by singing Survior's- the search is over. Or maybe love has always been beside you but yeah.. blinded. Well.. I might be on my way.

Black Cherry

"How can it be?
I can taste you now
How can I see
When you're everything
All my world in one grain of sand
And I've blown it
All my world in one grain of sand
And you own it.....

Black Cherry
Black Cherry

....Hearing you say it
I could die"

(Black Cherry, Goldfrapp)

Polaroid

Mid February

Love
Grow

Reach
Experience

Feel
See
Wish
Believe
Live
Dream
Change
Beauty

"There are moments in our lives when we find ourselves at a crossroads. Afraid. Confused. Without a roadmap. The choices we make in those moments can define the rest of our days. Of course, when faced with the unknown, most of us prefer to turn around and go back. But once in a while people push on to something better. Something found just beyond the pain of going it alone. And just beyond the bravery and courage it takes to let someone in. Or to give someone a second chance. Something beyond the quiet persistence of a dream. Because it's only when you're tested, that you truly discover who you are. And it's only when you're tested, that you discover who you can be. The person you want to be does exist. Somewhere on the other side of hard work and faith and belief ... and beyond the heartache and fear of what lies ahead."
- One Tree Hill

I promised myself to write soon but i never could or did till tonight. My world has become the aftermath of a minor earthquake. But up is still up, down is still down. A book is still a book, and an owl is still awake at this hour. Just yesterday, was the first time i sat for a christian funeral. It was my Aunt Veronica's. I had to wear a black formal dress. So says my dad. I started looking around the big house to pick on those not wearing one.. I was desperate. I couldn't take all the painful black. Its like you becoming a blackbird and that you can only fly in blackness. But this part of life, taught me faith. How it really feels, when ur wearing it on ur skin, then just on ur clothes.

Aside from that, work is like a careless painting of colors. And in that painting.. lies 3 cold colors.. which its not worth keeping them in the picture. You'll change it right? I would. So.. goodbye to ice! To soothe, i'll be having my baptism on the 11th of April to be distracted with. I am still fretting over my list of sins. Which should be confessed first.. the least worst? or the worst worst? This should be exciting!

Well.. time to dream a little dream of love;)

Dream

I was a little girl alone in my little world
who dreamed of a little home for me.
I played pretend between the trees,
and fed my houseguests bark and leaves,
and laughed in my pretty bed of green.

I had a dream
That I could fly from the highest swing.
I had a dream.

Long walks in the dark through woods grown behind the park,
I asked God who I'm supposed to be.
The stars smiled down on me,
God answered in silent reverie. I said a prayer and fell asleep.

I had a dream
That I could fly from the highest tree.
I had a dream.

Now I'm old and feeling grey.
I don't know what's left to say about this life I'm willing to leave.
I lived it full and I lived it well,
there's many tales I've lived to tell. I'm ready now,
I'm ready now, I'm ready now to fly from the highest wing.

I had a dream

About me

I am sitting here in the living room, ramnants of my make up still surviving, talking to Franco about humans to ghosts to the moon. Its such a cold night, i abandoned the fan about 2 hours ago. But I wish there was snow. It would be lovely, to stand on blended ice with a camera on my mittened hands. Yet. Another dream. I should name my blog dreamland. Should i? But my dreamland won't be like alice's. There would be drizzle, anomalies, lakes.. so they say, water is the catalyst for a pisces's smile. I should try to change the subject of Collette and her bag of destinations yet to reach. Like now i am navigating through jobs webland. I am deprived of what i like to do. I hope to stumble upon anything to do with art. Speaking of art i really love the works of Courtney Brims;





List 10 things I LOVE, 10 things I DON'T LOVE
and 5 random things about me.

Love

Coffee
Lingeries and perfume
White
Art Exhibitions.
changing my nail color twice a week
Travel
Cameras.
Murder the dancefloor
The fridge when there's sushi
Reading.

Don't Love

Oysters.
Waiting around for public transport.
Cold shower.
Sound of crickets
lazy conversations
Wondering away too much with my mind
heels (lovehate relationship)
Game of love
When coco begs for food
Tomato

Random

I like swans.
I eat more than 1 polky sticks at a time.
"jinx! you owe me a soda!" Jinx what? where can i get soda?
I can't light a lighter.

I'm left handed.


I tag...

Valeria
Lei-leigh
Nicola

Night entry

Hy.
I meant to write. I always meant to write. But the days, they get in the way, and the nights get packed with food and diaries. My bones says: "sleep, pls sleep" Just awhile longer, bones. You can wait. A number of times i find my fingers scrolling left right.. right again, through my ipod looking for something i had a craving for. But now its always that very song that flows into my ear. i wonder...


“People have stars, but they aren’t the same. For travelers, the stars are guides. For other people, they’re nothing but tiny lights. And for still others, for scholars, they’re problems. For my businessman, they were gold. But all those stars are silent stars. You, though, you’ll have stars like nobody else.”
“What do you mean?”
“When you look up at the sky at night, since I’ll be living on one of them, since I’ll be laughing on one of them, for you, it’ll be as if all the stars are laughing. You’ll have stars that can laugh!”
And he laughed again.
“And when you’re consoled (everyone is eventually consoled), you’ll be glad you’ve known me. You’ll always be my friend. You’ll feel like laughing with me. And you’ll open your windows sometimes just for the fun of it… And your friends will be amazed to see you laughing while you’re looking up at the sky. Then you’ll tell them, ‘Yes, it’s the stars. They always make me laugh!”
- Le Petit Prince



I added a dove. Dove makes me happy.